Isn't it time you indulged in a little humble brag?

Because if you don’t ASK, you almost certainly won’t GET.

FIT: White dress overlay by Pops & Lo, pink mini dress by Zara, Bag by H&M, Anklets handmade by Tina Rose Lawless and Shoes by Agent Provocateur.

The two things I’m good at are writing and making things look good (clothes, homes, husbands). And yes I know what you’re thinking; the hubris! Perhaps you’re right. But it’s a very British thing to play down your achievements and abilities and I don’t think it’s doing us any favours.

LinkedIn is the only social media platform I’m using at the moment and it is full of people talking about how amazing they are and what they’ve achieved in their careers. Many of these are Americans who are known to be unapologetic in such things.For it seems that while Britain has finally come down off its high horse in recent times having previously taken on the self-appointed title of “Great Britain”, the US has gone the other way and is apparently trying to “Make America Great Again”. Politics aside, LinkedIn exists for career networking and the one place we should actually be embracing the idea that here is where you shout to be heard above the cacophony of noise that already exists in the online space. That is, if you want to advance in your career.

But it’s not easy. I inwardly cringe when I see posts from recent graduates or those returning to work after a period of absence. The often lengthy posts tell stories of past failure and include an ask for LinkedIn users to share with their wider networks should their skills be in need. I cringe because they smack of desperation and God forbid we be seen as desperate.

The second part of this story is how wild it is that these posts get shared alot and always seem accompanied by comment after comment of support and encouragement from users both known and unknown to the original poster.

Who knows whether these result in a job offer, but isn’t it a truth universally acknowledged that if you don’t ask you almost certainly won’t get??

I remember a few years ago wanting to join a members club but not wanting to pay the joining fee (this will make sense for those of you who know me because I basically believe I should have unrestricted access to such things - one friend says I have what he calls a “Queen complex”, to which I concur).

At the time, I spent a few hours ruminating on this desire and finally landed on a proposal which offered my services as a creative in residence free of charge to the club, in return for membership. I researched and emailed three clubs I particularly liked, telling them how incredible I was at my day job and what an asset I’d be to their team. Out of the three I had two responses, a face-to-face meeting with one which was promising but the other resulted in a two-year contract and the creation of my own event within their member programming.

Another thing that comes to mind is when I became obsessed with a particular lingerie brand and created a tailor made CV based on their branding in order to apply for a job that didn’t (yet) exist. (This was years ago - ahem - before everyone started doing this.) I found the brand’s official font online, adopted their slogans in my headings and used their own colour palette to format it. It took four years of emailing, phone calls and basically stalking their Creative Director for them to offer me a job. By which time I had found another one and was over it but you get the idea - sometimes you just have to play the long game because at one point there was no job fit for me, but as soon as there was, I bypassed the usual search process and the CD emailed me directly to tell me about the available role.

I don’t know where you are with what you want in your life, but it’s really important to know that you absolutely CAN ask for what you want, even if it asking makes you a bit uncomfortable. A case in point, a friend of mine who used to work as a head hunter said the only people who used to ask for pay increases were men and they were often massively inflated whereas the women generally settled for what they were offered. 

Male or female, the message here is DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK. And if that looks like airing your career laundry in public then so be it. Stop being embarrassed (read, British) about being confident in your skill set and/or your desires. 

The most important thing to remember is that YOU can tell people how good you are. Shoot your shot! You don’t have to wait for someone else to affirm you. So… don’t. 🤷🏾‍♀️